IMG_7745I grew up believing that running away was never the answer and yet I am boarding the train anyway, told I needed a fresh start. But there’s the catch with new beginnings: they are preceded by something requiring you to start over. And I know one day you’ll find me.

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She yearned for kindness over companionship. Hope over security. Sincerity over love. Love, she learned, came at a cost. Love was conditional. Love was painful and secret. Love held her down.

But love also allowed her to dream of the day she would set herself free.

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Drunk, he passed out on me like a corpse. The full weight of Richard was almost too much to bear but I resigned myself to stay where I was and squirmed until I got comfortable. Being under Richard wasn’t so bad. There were worse places to be.

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It is cold and gnarled fingers of both hands wrap around a coffee as he stares out across the lake. Tears. Longing.  Who do his old tired arms miss embracing?

I cannot ease his pain so I buy him a fresh coffee and allow him more time to remember.

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You once revealed yourself to me. Your icy exterior thawed by my warm kiss, I saw just briefly, your true colours. I fell in love. But now my visibility is obscured and I am drifting away. One last attempt at ablation is all I have left.

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In the coming darkness of our love, all you give is your shadow.  So familiar am I with your outline, I could mold you in my sleep. But I long for more than our silhouettes dancing against the setting sun. Reveal yourself to the light. I am not afraid.

EncumbranceTo secure your love you required my assets but the interest on your heart came at too high a price. I am love poor.  You are an encumbrance. I need to break free before you foreclose on my heart.

Ever distant yet ever present, please stop calling me home.

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